When I saw that Mas Lucha was starting a streaming service where the first show would be an all luchadoras tournament, my first thought was…well quite frankly I didn’t think anything of it because I was probably too busy watching Veronica Mars on Hulu at the time. Then I learned two of my favorite luchadore(a)s alive, Ludark Shaitan and Zeuxis, were involved and gorramit even the presence of The Artist Formerly Known as Sexy Star (Dulce Sexy) wasn’t a big enough deal for me to convince the Lucha Central powers that be to invest the small amount needed to subscribe. Throw in the fact that reviewing lucha shows is something I like to do and that is how I became, as far as I know, the only lucha person I’m aware of to review the first Mas Lucha streaming service show, called Torneo Suprema.

There’s a lot to say about this first show, none more important that, from a technical standpoint, this was a borderline disaster for Mas Lucha. The show, taped earlier in the day (or perhaps several days before) on July 18^th, was supposed to stream at 9 p.m. EST; instead it began at 11:29 p.m., nearly two and a half hours later, due to technical issues. The first two matches then went off without a hitch before the audio started to go in and out, followed by several periods of the video dying (sometime for minutes at a time), coming back and dying again, all before things finally got on track in the back third. The only saving grace for this is that the cost of subscribing to this Mas Lucha service is so low that it’s more aggravating then full on infuriating; never the less these were major issues that didn’t install much confidence in me for this service for the immediate future. Most damaging for Mas Lucha is that these issues hurt what was, from a ring standpoint, a show that was much better than I expected. There was has been strong criticism towards the luchadoras scene in Mexico outside of AAA and this tournament, most notable for featuring Ayako Hamada, Zeuxis, several well known to unknown indie names and the widely loathed Sexy, didn’t exactly look promising. And that was before you factored in the likelihood of Sexy wrestling not once, not twice but THREE TIMES! Fortunately though the in ring product turned out to be quite watchable and at times good, thanks to decent runs from Hamada and Zeuxis, a much better than expected set of performances from Sexy and generally good work from all the other luchadoras too. I wouldn’t call it a blow away show, but I had a good time watching it and may have had a better time if Mas Lucha had handled the technical aspects better. Alas it wasn’t meant to be. On that note though let’s leave the technical stuff in the dust and focus on what happened in the ring, while maybe telling a joke or two. BRING BACK THE MOSES PICTURE!

Dulce Sexy defeated Baby Love

Sports fans, I want you to picture waiting two plus hours for a show to start, followed by it starting…and the first match being a Sexy Star (Dulce Sexy) match. It was nearly a situation out of a Simpsons gif I tell you.

Fortunately, and this may be the fact that I loathed that Impact Slammiversary show so much and had no expectations, I wasn’t that bothered by this match. I wouldn’t call it good; Baby Love has a good motor and did some nice things (mostly involving moonsaults), but she’s obviously still a bit green and the match went far too long for someone given her experience. Even still I was somewhat surprised by this, and Grodd forgive me, I’ve got to give credit to Sexy. She is what she is in and out of the ring but it’s quite clear she’s 100% better as an arrogant ruda than the inspiration hero she was on Lucha Underground, and as such her performance here was far better than usual. It still isn’t what I’d call good but it was serviceable, and dammit if I wasn’t ready to accept that at this point in the evening. So yeah; match was too long and Baby Love needs work, but in the end I got The Man in the Iron Mask instead of The Beach. And trust me; you’ll take the former over the latter every time. Every. Time.

Lolita defeated Reina Dorada

Let’s do some good news bad news. The good news is this match was better than the opener! The bad news is the match was still aggressively average. Lolita and Dorada tried to differentiate the match from the opener by making this more a back and forth strike fest and at times it worked with both luchadoras getting some good shots in. The problem is there were also several moments where things were nowhere near as crisp as they could’ve been and that, coupled with a real lack of “WOW!” moments really left this match feeling just kind of there. What can you do right? Alas it was still an easy watch and Lolita winning wound up to be one of the better decisions on the show, mostly because it led to what happened in the semi-finals.

Zeuxis defeated Diosa Quetzel

This was a roller coaster of emotions sports fans. First Zeuxis came out and I was like…

Yes I have lowered myself to using one of these gifs. Big whoop. I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU ALL THINK!

Then the match happened, Zeuxis was awesome (as per usual), Diosa kept up with her and the KNEE ATTACK made an appearance and I was like…

And then the stream crapped out and I was like…

So yeah; roller coaster of emotions. Fortunately this was a taped show and the stream eventually returned back to where we were, and seconds later Zeuxis finished off Diosa with a Package Piledriver for the win. Honestly the only major negative was the streaming issues here. Beyond that the match was easily the best thing on the show to this point. Diosa is still rough around some edges but this was a strong follow up for her after her impressive performance against one of the Fulgors at IWRG’s Rey de Ring, complete with some nice submissions and athleticism. But this was Zeuxis’ show and the Queen of Lucha Libre remains the best between her great striking and power moves. Boy I have missed her. I’d say she should go back to CMLL but I wouldn’t wish that on Dulce Sexy so never mind that! But yeah; this was good and I enjoyed it.

Ayako Hamada defeated Ludark Shaitan

So this didn’t go the way I wanted it to go. I was fully expecting for this night to end with our heroine, Ludark Shaitan, holding that Mas Lucha trophy high over her head while I arranged for the safest travel possible to the victory party, which was surely to feature a lot of Pepsi and head banging to Slipknot. Instead Ayako Hamada hit a Michinoku Driver, Ludark kicked out, the ref counted three and this is all the biggest conspiracy since that one involving Gary Oldman, Joe Pesci and Tommy Lee Jones. It’s a mystery, wrapped in a riddle inside an enigma. THE FRIGGIN SHOOTERS DON’T EVEN KNOW!

Alright enough about the conspiracy (for now). Let’s talk about the match, which wasn’t quite Zeuxis-Diosa but was overall quite good. I would’ve liked a few minutes myself but with what they got both Hamada and Ludark came off quite well. I know a lot of people associate Ludark with the lucha extrema stuff (and in fairness, she’s awesome at that) but she’s a sneakily underrated overall worker and it showed here against Hamada, only one of the better luchadoras in recent memory. Aside from a few errant kicks I thought the action was smooth, everything looked good and it was really again just a matter of them needing a few more minutes. I think if they had gotten the time Sexy and Baby Love got it would’ve been a benefit for both matches. Alas this was still solid…until Hamada and the ref conspired to screw over my favorite. I WILL NOT REST UNTIL I HAVE MY REVENGE HAMADA! YOU HEAR ME?! YOU HEAR ME?!!!!!

Dulce Sexy defeated Lolita

Here’s my biggest criticism of this match; they actually had the gall to end it with Sexy submitting Lolita with an armbar, only the same submission she legit injured Rosemary with three years ago. I suppose it could’ve been coincidence, but then again Paul Heyman also may have been responsible for the firings of Gallows and Anderson. That doesn’t make it likely! That moment aside I was pleasantly surprised with how much I liked this match. It was surprisingly smooth, not surprisingly snug (is Sexy Star never not snug?), well paced and this time didn’t feel long because this time Sexy was in there with someone who could hang. Hell Lolita did more than hang as she was the MVP of this match, going blow for blow with Sexy and delivering the best moment of the match in the form of a second rope Swanton Bomb that crushed, and I mean CRUSHED, Sexy. Tremendous stuff. And once again I must credit Sexy; I’m guessing it’s largely because she knew she was going far but for the second straight match her working boots were on, and it was once again quite apparent that she works best as the cold, detached, arrogant ruda who seems insulted to even be in this struggle. They say the best art imitates real life after all! Whatever it was it worked. This was very good, dumb finish aside.

Zeuxis defeated Ayako Hamada

This could be my Zeuxis bias talking here sports fans but this match made me want to dust off this old diddy.

If you ever wanted to know what an Ayako Hamada/Zeuxis sprint would look like, this was it. And it was fantastic fun. That shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone considering Hamada and Zeuxis were the two best workers in this field (other than Ludark of course!) and they were on it from the word go with some good striking, several missed moonsault attempts and pretty much nonstop action throughout. Normally I would be upset it didn’t get more time but the pace they were working at required this to go shorter and in the end I thought it suited the situation perfectly. And Zeuxis won to boot! I have nothing negative to say about this match at all. It was borderline great and easily the best thing about this tournament. And did I mention Zeuxis won? Or how much I’ve missed her? OR HOW HAPPY I WAS SHE REDEEMED LUDARK AFTER SHE WAS HOSED BY THE REF?! Stop screaming Cult; you’re scaring the readers away.

Torneo Suprema Final

Dulce Sexy defeated Zeuxis

I’ll give Sexy this much; on a night where I had to watch three of her matches (none of which I didn’t hate to be fair) she at least found a way to differentiate them; one match was WAY too long, one match was just right and one match was too short. This match was the latter, and it kind of makes you wonder how Sexy or whoever put these matches together thought “Sexy vs. Zeuxis needs to be short. But Sexy vs. two year pro Baby Love? GOTTA BE NEAR FIFTEEN MINUTES DUDE!” Sounds like something from this guy.

So yeah; this match felt like it needed a few more minutes and then just ended after Sexy nailed Zeuxis with a hurricanrana off the top. Up till then, for the third time tonight, I found myself bewildered at how I didn’t hate a match involving the former Sexy Star. I don’t know what tell you sports fans. I will never be a fan of hers after what she did to Rosemary and I still don’t believe any major promotion in any country should touch her, but as a performer she is far more tolerable in this ruda persona. Certainly it helped that Zeuxis was involved with yet another strong performance and, while it’s nowhere near what it would’ve been a few years ago,  the former top CMLL luchadora vs. the former top AAA luchadora is if nothing else interesting. But I cannot lie; Sexy did alright yet again, working hard, taking some hard Zeuxis strikes (there was a dropkick spot Keyra would’ve approved of). I would still venture to guess it’s because she knew she had this thing in the bag and perhaps a Zeuxis win would’ve meant a half assed performance; alas we’ll never know. The point is this was a very solid (if rushed) match, Sexy was fine and Zeuxis was awesome. If there’s any positive to come out of this show, it’s the reminder that Zeuxis is really, really good, the CMLL luchadoras division has truly been a black hole since she left (other than Avispa Dorada) and if someone can book her in more showcases like this one, that would be great. Just make sure your stream works before you do it. Looking at you Mas Lucha!

And on that note I’m off to…oh who the hell knows? I’ll think of something. I will see you all tomorrow for some AAA presser recapping so there’s that. Otherwise, we’ll meet again when the next column idea hits or when more shows start popping up. Till then, JUSTICE FOR LUDARK!

Seriously, how do you tell this bad ass “you’re going out in Round 1”? Can’t be done! Unless you’re Mas Lucha

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