It’s no secret that CMLL has had a rough second half of 2018 sports fans. Even still the one thing you could kinda, sorta count on was going into Super Viernes on Friday with the hope the show would be good. You can’t even say that this week. I cannot remember being less interested in a Super Viernes than I am this one; there are no interesting angles, a slew of forgettable matches and the only match that does really standout is a question mark because it disappointed the first time. We’ll see what happens when the show is done but right now I’m already dreading the chore this show feels like it’ll be. At least the preview wasn’t so bad I guess. Let’s get to that now, shall we?
Halcón Suriano Jr. & Robin vs. Espanto Jr. & Grako
What to Expect: It’s good news/bad news for Halcón Suriano Jr. The good news is he’s finally free from that dead end Mini-Estrellas division and is on his way up to the regular division, while also dropping the Stukita name. The bad news is he’s now stuck in the same dead end spot Astral and Eléctrico found themselves in upon moving up. New name, same shitty booking! I will say he’s at least in a somewhat hopeful spot in regards to this match. Robin is a really fun teammate to have, Grako has come on strong since teaming with El Coyote and Espanto Jr….alright maybe Suriano would be wise to stay away from him. As far as debuts go Suriano could’ve gotten stuck with Sangre Imperial and Retro as partners while Metálico slithered his way into the rudo side. Just because it could’ve been worse doesn’t mean it’s still not dire though, and unless Robin and Suriano (who was always really good as Stukita) manage to overcome the opening match restrictions/Espanto Jr., I get the feeling the Artist Formerly Known as Stukita isn’t going to notice much difference from his old position.
Winners: I suppose another bit of good news is that Espanto and Grako matter so little that Suriano could at least be a winner for his first match under the new role. I say he and Robin take it in three falls.
Astral, Eléctrico, Fuego vs. Cancerbero, Disturbio, Raziel
What to Expect: Get ready to get hyped sports fans; our lord and savior Raziel has returned! For real; he was on the Tuesday show and what says “I’m back!” more than being on the Tuesday show.
But that’s not all. Not only has Raziel returned but he will be spending his Friday night doing what he does best; conspiring with his teammates to give the technicos absolutely no slack en route to a semi-dominate victory!
The sad thing is that I’m actually excited about that prospect sports fans. I mean come on; what else is there to get excited about in regards to this match? We all know the only hope it has is if Cancerbero and Raziel (Disturbio is fine) actually decide to try and give the technicos something to do. And there’s a better chance of Francis Ford Coppola calling me tonight and saying “Cult, let’s make this Megalopolis thing a shot” than that happening, thus neutering any usefulness Astral, Eléctrico and future AAA luchador Fuego may bring. It pretty much just leaves you with Raziel’s second match back from whatever he disappeared from and the prospect of him and Cancerbero doing the same shit they always do. For one night I’ll be happy to see it.
Winners: LOL do I even need to dignify this section with a prediction? Actually yes I do; the rudos win in three falls.
Esfinge, Titán, Tritón vs. Misterioso Jr., Templario, Vangellys
What to Expect: What a tricky match this is to break down. On the one hand it features Titán, Tritón and Templario, three dudes capable of having a great performance at the drop of a hat. Or is it dime? On the other hand the match also features Esfinge, Misterioso and Vangellys, who’s best qualities are annoying stripper dances (Esfinge), stepping up only on big shows (Misterioso) and dressing like Joseph Goebbels’ version of M. Bison. Your mileage may vary sports fans but to me, those things being your high point (especially when one is being a Street Fighter character acting like a Nazi) pretty much sums up how worthless you are. I suppose Titán, Tritón and Templario doing enough cool things might be enough to get Misterioso to try or Esfinge to have a better than usual night, but my guess is we’re going to get a little too much of the bad here and only a few cool highlights to cancel it out. In other words, expect to feel very sorry for Titán, Tritón and Templario when it’s all over.
Winners: Not only are the rudos winning this match but they’re winning it in two falls. Why? Because CMLL loves the two fall match these days, that’s why! Maybe we should start sympathizing with Titán, Tritón and Templario now.
Soberano Jr. vs. Forastero
What to Expect: I’m tempted to use the “NOW THIS IS PODRACING” picture for this match…the problem is we’ve already seen it and it was less podracing and more Anakin being all “are you an angel?” when Padme walks in. Alright let’s compromise and just go with the “Obi-Wan dancing in the speeder gif” shall we?
There; now to this rematch. I can’t believe we’re even questioning whether Soberano and Forastero can have a good match against each other, but there has to be questions after their first singles encounter was just so underwhelming. I still believe the mistake they made during that first match was wrestling it like it was a three fall match, with both guys trying to build to stuff instead of just going full throttle for seven or eight minutes. That has to be the play here. I’m all for Soberano and Forastero slowing it down when the time is right but that’s an actual three fall match; this is the time to go absolutely nuts and try to top what Australian Suicide and Laredo Kid did last week. Both guys are more than capable of doing it and normally I wouldn’t even think twice about them pulling it off. It just goes to show you how disappointing that first Lightning Match was. I anticipate they’ll have learned their lesson and come out guns blazing for this match; or maybe I’m just hoping. Either way this is the most interesting match on the show by about fifty square miles.
Winner: I’m going with Soberano, mainly because a) he lost the first match and b) there’s a few too many rumblings that he’s about to get pushed down the card due to a disappointing New Japan tour. It might be wishful thinking on my part but for at least a week I say Soberano quiets that noise with a victory via Fire Driver around the nine minute mark.
Ángel de Oro, Diamante Azul, Niebla Roja vs. Bestia del Ring, Rey Bucanero, Shocker
What to Expect: You know how we’re all feeling bad for Titán, Tritón and Templario? Prepare to feel even worse for Ángel de Oro, Diamante Azul and Niebla Roja! If you thought those guys had it bad earlier, these three have to deal with Bestia del Ring, Rey Bucanero and Shocker. Rey Rey Buc is easily the best of those three rudos and the best thing you can say about him these days is that he looks really good bald (seriously; keep the shaved look Rey Rey Buc). I’m pretty sure there’s no way to get a good match out of that unit, and that’s even if Shocker somehow gets lost on the way to Arena Mexico as he occasionally does. If you watch this match then I feel sorry for you. At least for Azul, Oro and Roja this is their job; what’s your excuse?
Winners: The technicos win by DQ after three excruciating falls. Now can we move on please? I don’t even want to look at that match anymore.
Carístico, Valiente, Volador Jr. vs. Cuatrero, Sansón, Último Guerrero
What to Expect: I see this match going one of two ways. The first is CMLL allows these six, who range from really good to great (unless they’ve faced each other ten billion times ala Volador and the UG) to just go out there and go nuts to send the crowd home happy with a great main event. The second is that CMLL sets up what they were originally planning for last week; Carístico vs. the UG. I suppose CMLL can always split the difference and go with a combo of both ideas but either way it seems like we’re heading towards that match now that Carístico is healthy again. I have no problem if we do (Carístico vs. UG has been done, but not to death like Volador-UG has) but even still…don’t you just kind of wish CMLL just let these guys have a match and then move on? Even though I have no objections to Carístico-UG it’s still not a match I’m dying to see, and the set up for it will be coming after a show that, in case you haven’t noticed, is a whole lot on the lame side. In the end, I guess I kind of just hope CMLL decides to scrap that program, lets these six have a killer main event to at least end the show on a high note and hopefully resets come next week. So what if it’s not actually going to happen; LET A MAN DREAM!
Winners: Yeah, we’re definitely getting Carístico vs. the UG. I say CMLL sets it up with the UG sneaking a foul in on Carístico to pick up the win, followed by an always fun UG-Carístico challenge promo that leads to the match next week. Thank you and please drive home safe.
That’ll do it sports fans. I’ll see you tomorrow for the Live Review. Oh good Grodd, I actually have to do a Live Review of this show. Now I really do wish that party I had last week was tomorrow night. And now I just said that out loud. Let’s leave before I get myself in more trouble! TILL NEXT TIME!
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