BEFORE DIVING IN – DON’T MISS YOUR CHANCE TO WIN AN AUTOGRAPHED REY FENIX MASK!

 

We are five minutes away from AAA’s Verano de Escandalo sports fans, a show that could go down as one of the best shows in lucha libre this year. Certainly it’ll go down as the most interesting, what with all the potential surprises we could see. It’s the kind of show a live review was made for, and that’s what Lucha Central will be giving you tonight. So be a pal and follow along here with us as AAA takes us on an adventure we won’t soon forget. To the review mobile!

 

LET-THERE-BE-MORE-LUCHA

 

Arkángel Divino, Dinastia, Hijo del Vikingo, Starfire defeated Arez, Belial, Lady Maravilla, Último Maltido

 

 

You know sports fans, you’d think at this point these openers would be unable to top the previous efforts. NOPE! This match topped the Arena Aficion opener, the the Tehuacan opener; even the Tijuana opener was not quite as good as this shindig. The best way to describe it is if you watched Mad Max: Fury Road while listening to Mickey from Rocky yelling “speed! SPEED!” repeatedly while on your third bottle of Mountain Dew. The pace was unreal, the action was unreal and everyone in this match looked like a superstar. Dinastia was honestly the worst of these four and he was better than most people I see in CMLL openers these days. I don’t want to single anyone out because all eight luchadore(a)s were special in this match, but I must give props to Arkángel Divino, Starfire and Lady Maravilla specifically. Divino did things in this match I can only imagine Aerostar doing, Maravilla looked like she had been let out of a cage (figuratively she had been) and Starfire dished and took beatings like it was second nature. It was a sight to see. I could be here all night talking about this but we’ve got stuff going on right now so I can’t! Just know this was the best opener AAA has had this year and that’s saying something given the quality we’ve been seeing.

 

Vamp’s Gonna Vamp

 

Talk about taking a step down. For a moment I was very excited when Juventud Guerrera came out to cut a promo…and then Vampiro came out, they traded words and Vamp proceeded to punk Juvy out. It’s early in the show sports fans so maybe this will pay off later. But my Grodd right now it just makes Juvy (and by extension MAD) look like a dope who got owned by a guy who needs a rub like I need another Sunkist. Maybe it’ll make sense later but right now…ugh. Not what the show needed after that great opener.

 

Lady Shani, Mamba, Pimpinela Escarlata defeated Black Danger, Keyra, La Hiedra

 

This was much, MUCH better than I thought it would be when previewing it. In my defense, I didn’t expect it to only go a crisp seven minutes, didn’t know for sure if Keyra would be involved and certainly didn’t expect Pimpinela Escarlata to be as good as he was. All three things collided to make this match work. Keyra is considered by many to be the best luchadora alive and she looked it in her brief interludes here, and her strong segments with Mamba show why those two want a big match together so badly. Meanwhile Lady Shani was solid, Black Danger showed up and looked good in limited action, Hiedra continues to look better than I could’ve ever expected and, as mentioned, Pimpinela Escarlata was far better than expected. Part of it was he was trying a lot harder than usual, part of it was he was working with a great set of rudos who could make him look great. I don’t know if he could’ve kept it up if the match got more time, but at least we won’t have to find out. For what it was this was a fine match, and even better we got some solid build to Faby Apache and Shani by Faby obliterating her after the match. That’ll add some heat to a feud that has been lacking heat before the last few shows.

 

Oh Look; Imposter Parka

 

I’ll be honest sports fans; I tuned out as soon as this wannabe poser came out and only popped when Monterrey chanted very loudly for LA Park. That might’ve been the greatest moment in wrestling history for yours truly. After that he said some shit about Elite, not a single person gave a shit and then he left. Would’ve been better if he had announced his retirement. There’s always next time I suppose!

 

Juventud Guerrera, Kevin Kross, Texano Jr. defeated La Máscara, Máximo, Pagano

 

What do you know; not only was this match earlier in the show but it actually went off as advertised. There truly are first times for everything in AAA. Good thing too because, while this match wasn’t on the level of the opener, it was a pretty good time. No this was not the breakout performance Máscara and Máximo need; they were better than they were against the Vipers the last few shows but they mostly just lived to take a beating. What carried this match was a far better performance from Pagano than he gave on Thursday, and tremendous work from the rudos. Kevin Kross was finally allowed to wrestle and looked as terrifying as he does when he wrecks fools. Texano was Texano. Juvy was tremendous; not only does he look to be in better shape now than he did in his WCW days but he still moves around like he did back then. His elbow drop and Frog Splash were tremendous…really everything he did was tremendous. Given how he was treated in the Vampiro segment, this was exactly what the doctor ordered for Juvy and MAD. This was really well done, with the only fault being Pagano nearly killing himself on a table bump. Or as we call it, just another Sunday for Pagano.

 

Aerostar defeated Australian Suicide, Darby Allin, Drago, Golden Magic and Sammy Guevara

 

So…I’m still not sure what happened here. It looked like Aerostar hit a cutter on Guevara, went for a pin, it was broken up and then the match was over anyway. What actually happened (upon seeing the replay) is Tirantes counted Guevara down anyway despite the break up, so the match was called. What do you know; a Tirantes ruining a match.

 

 

In fairness, things weren’t exactly going the way we all expected this to go. I didn’t find the match as disappointing as some others did before the finish; there were some sloppy moments but there were a lot of great ones too, with Darby Allin looking fantastic, Golden Magic (added last second) having a nice debut and the pace being exactly what it needed to be. That being said, there was no doubt this wasn’t connecting with the crowd and something about the match just seemed to be a bit off. I would’ve liked to have seen them get a few more minutes to see if things would’ve turned around, but that finish made it so we’ll never get to know. Overall this was disappointing, so much so that even the nice Guevara-Aerostar brawl at the end couldn’t save the proceedings entirely.

 

The Letdown

 

Ladies and gentlemen I have seen some disappointments in my day; the Fingerpoke of Doom, the 2014 and 2015 Royal Rumbles, you name it. What just happened may have topped all of that and then some. It started with Kross and Juvy coming out with a masked man to Konnan’s music. Turns out it was all a swerve; Konnan wasn’t the guy with them, for instead it was Double J, Jeff Jarrett. You know; the same dumbass who wrestled at Triplemania drunk last year and only got away with it because Sexy Star was an even bigger moron.

 

Image result for Jeff Jarrett AAA gif

 

I’m not going to sugar coat it folks, nor am I going to even go into detail over Dr. Wagner and La Parka coming out or whatever happened afterwards. This is a disgrace. Jeff Jarrett not only is way past his prime and not very good, but the last time we saw him in AAA he was endangering his fellow workers by wrestling drunk. DRUNK. Now he gets to waltz back in and be the leader of MAD, thus nuking the angle upon arrival? Bullshit. Bullshit, bullshit and bullshit. If I wasn’t reviewing this show for the site, I would be turning this show off right now. Here I was thinking AAA was changing and instead they’re just doing the same old bullshit they always do. Thanks for getting my hopes up again AAA. I’ve learned a valuable lesson.

 

Brian Cage, El Hijo del Fantasma, Rey Escorpión defeated Extreme Tiger, Laredo Kid, Psycho Clown

 

Once again.

 

 

What a roller coaster ride this match was. It began as a tag match, then suddenly turned into a three on one beat down by Fantasma, Cage and Escorpión only for a returning Extreme Tiger and Laredo Kid to interfere. These six were then going at it when in the middle of the match the fuse blew and the show was plunged into darkness. I’m not joking; Pitch Black wasn’t as dark as this match was. Considering what happened before this match I was pretty sure this show had fallen off a cliff. And then a funny thing happened; these six kept working their asses off and delivered one of the greatest performances I’ve ever seen. Again it was pitch black in there. Pitch black. And yet these guys worked the match like nothing happened and delivered, if not a great match, a really good match when all was said and done. Outstanding. I’m not going to single out anyone here because all six of these guys were amazing. To do what they did with that degree of difficulty…it deserves a gorram standing ovation. And so that’s what they’ll get. What a job by these six guys. They may have just saved the show and some of it was all by accident.

 

Hair vs. Hair Match

Averno, Chessman, Super Fly defeated Carta Brava Jr., Mocho Cota Jr., Tito Santana

 

After all that has gone on tonight it’s nice to get something that was, well, normal. Of course normal in AAA is bashing each other with chairs, breaking bottles over heads and doing all sorts of insane shit. And make no mistake, this match was insane. It was a bar room brawl that was just missing the bar. I’m pretty sure everyone bled, I’m pretty sure everyone tool a hard lick or too and my Grodd Carta Brava Jr. bled so much after taking a bottle shot to the head that it made the wave of blood in The Shining look tame. Most importantly it all worked. I bought this match all the way though, the punishment each team delivered was well earned and, like many other matches tonight, the performances by everyone involved were top notch. AAA can’t do this all the time (they will unfortunately) but when it’s for a situation like this, my Grodd does it work. An absolutely tremendous fight and I loved both teams shaking hands and showing respect at the end. It was well earned and even though they lost, I can’t help but feel this did a whole lot for Poder del Norte. They were stars in my eyes already; they should be even more so to everyone else now.

 

Triple Threat Match for the AAA Mega Championship

Jeff Jarrett defeated Dr. Wagner Jr. and Rey Mysterio Jr.

 

Somehow, someway, I am using this damn meme again. At the rate AAA shows are going now Batman may need to start collecting royalties from them.

 

 

Now first things first; this match blew chunks. I actually feel terrible for Wagner and Mysterio because they were trying and looked pretty good against each other. In a regular singles match I think they would’ve delivered the goods. The problem is Jeff Jarrett, as stated earlier, cannot work to save his life anymore and AAA’s move to cover that wasn’t to give Rey and Wagner more sequences but to make El Hijo del Tirantes the rudo referee to end all rudo referees. That killed the match right up until the end when AAA delivered two solid twists. First, after Tirantes had been laid out by Wagner, what seemed to be Imposter La Parka came down in a referee shirt to count the pin…except he didn’t, allowed Jarrett to lay out Wagner did a fast count to give Jarrett the win. Vampiro came out and Parka took off his mask to reveal Konnan; that’s right, Konnan was part of MAD all along and was just playing the long game! He, Jarrett, Juvy and Kross then beat down Rey, Wagner and Vampiro in what seemed to be the closing scene…and then Fenix of all people showed up! That’s right; Fenix, Lucha Underground star, MLW star, Impact star, Crash star and now CMLL star made his return to AAA, laid out all of MAD and had a stare down with Konnan before K-Dawg bounced.

 

Image result for Nostalgia Critic fainting gif

 

There is a whole hell of a lot to unpack here with Fenix, like what this means for his CMLL status this upcoming Friday (my opinion; it will affect nothing and Fenix will be appearing on CMLL and AAA going forward because holy shit wrestling is just that wild these days). But my Grodd, as good as his surprise was and as good as Konnan’s return was it just all feels wasted because some dumbass decided that what AAA and MAD needed was Jeff gorram Jarrett! The guy who, I’ll say it again, wrestled last year’s Triplemania the way Drone wrestled night two of FantasticaMania. It’s hard for that not to put a damper on things going forward, especially if you imagine a scenario where Fenix had been in Jarrett’s place and had gotten this big victory. A returning Fenix as AAA Mega Champion going into CMLL next Friday, not to mention the face of a group featuring Konnan, Juventud Guerrera and Kevin Kross? That’s money all across the board. At least I think it would’ve been; we’ll never know now though because AAA decided the best course was Jeff Jarrett. The doofus who started a promotion to run a gold scam.

 

That’s a wrap sports fans. Wow. This was a roller coaster of a show wasn’t it? Some of what AAA did tonight, like the opener, the unexpected black out match and the hair match were excellent. Other stuff was good to mediocre. There were surprises up the wazoo as expected. And none of it will matter because the whole thing was overshadowed by the return of JEFF “NEVER DREW A DIME” JARRETT! I’ll still be keeping an eye on things going forward for AAA and they can always turn this around, especially if Konnan and Fenix are around more now. But my goodness this show feels like a big opportunity wasted by AAA, something I didn’t think would happen now that the Vampiro era was over. With that I’m off to do something else. Till next time, this.

 

Image result for i am disappoint meme

 

Please change disks to continue…